Taking a Break

Our school gave us a four day break this weekend to rest between quads and take some time off. My guy left for a mini vacation in Colorado with friends and I felt a little overwhelmed at how hard it had become to be apart. determined not to play the part of the lonely girlfriend all weekend, I gathered up some girls and spent my days surrounded by creative, brave souls I’m growing to love.

On Saturday, I spent the morning wandering around my college town on my own, noticing the hum of my own breath and the importance of being still. There was no one to talk to, no one to consider. I was able to just walk and think and be alone. I found my way to the farmers market and sampled cinnamon soft pretzels. I admired the color orange. I stumbled upon a small art fair. It was a cool morning and I wore a cranberry red sweater and my hair was tangled and soft.

That afternoon, my friend Liv picked me up for dinner. we made salads at the whole foods store and bought dried fruit to eat as snacks. We remembered how great raisins are. When was the last time I had raisins? Liv’s mom brought us old quilts from home and we walked to the football field to watch my first ever football game. Our team won. 62 to 14.

On Sunday, Liv and I caught the 12:57 train into the city and spent the afternoon at the art institute. We pondered our preferences of scenic farmlands and post modern portraits. We found light in countless places–stairwells, hallways, stained glass windows. Afterwards, we wandered outside and walked along the waterfront. It was sixty five degrees and sunny, without a cloud in the sky. The water was green like jade and the sky was a very bright blue. We found a subpar sushi place and stuffed ourselves with raw fish. Our phones died on the train ride back and we talked about theater and birthdays and life.

Monday afternoon I met up with my friend Sarah and went on a long walk through the woods to the next town over. It was surprisingly warm and windy so we tied our jackets around our waists. I tried my first iced chai and Sarah ordered her standard pumpkin spice latte. We carried them around as we walked from store to store, looking at art books and considering buying our boyfriends ugly vintage ties. Our conversation was the warm but deep kind, about art and community and things the future held for both of us. We did that awkward standing in front of her apartment for five minutes thing when I dropped her off because we couldn’t stop talking. I love moments like that.

I feel rested and full after this weekend. There’s still the rogue paper or two to be hastily finished at the last minute, but I’m learning there’s time enough for that. There’s also time for slow walking and intentional words and human interaction.

It was far from a lonely weekend.

-Rachel

 

these words

i. you look beautiful in sweatpants

ii. you’re interesting, you know that?

iii. you’re descriptive, but you lack inertia

iv. that is an excellent question

v. thank you for your work

vi. i bought you cashews and kraft macaroni and cheese. oh and

vii. i love you

 

thank you friends, peers, professors, and strangers for these words. happy things to hold onto from this week.

-rachel